...

I cannot get angry at other people, at least I don't *think* I can anymore

It does no matter why, it does not matter if something bad happens non-stop, if it hurts me, if it hurts those who I care about

I could only do it for a while to my dad, after seeing him angry for a lot of time, and then to my mom, for letting it happen to her

And I do not want to be this way, because all it does is to make people I care about to be angry at me

But I have given up on it, I have decided it is who I am and I don't want or can change that about me

And I do wish I could, taste it and understand it, taste that sweet sweet revenge against those who hurt me, dwell on that small pleasure once in my life

But as I can't, all that is left to fantasize about it, share the taste with the one that can never experience it, myself